Anxious

Oh my god! I haven’t blogged in ages! What’s going on??

Anyway, I’ve just been missing everyone and panicking about housing for next year and assignments and feeling lonely actually.

I saw my parents this weekend, which was actually awesome! I hadn’t realised that I missed them that much. They came down here for the weekend but because of the awful rain (honestly, there was SO much), we couldn’t actually go anywhere and have a day out, so we ended up just driving round in the rain. I liked it though, was relaxing.

Thanks to Sophie, I watched This Is It last night. I was quite impressed actually and I have some doubt that he is actually dead. Apparently people think that about Elvis though and I think he’s actually well and truly dead, so I should stop being silly I guess.

I can’t wait to go home for Christmas. I’m ready to go now but obviously I can’t. Sadface. I’m excited about Christmas, as in REALLY excited and I haven’t been this excited since I was a kid, which I guess is quite sad but true.

I went “house hunting” with Chris today. Chris being the incredibly geeky geek on my course… I swear to god that he won’t leave me alone. I think he wants me to live with him. Something I don’t think I can do. However, I may not have a choice. Sadface.

Oh and X Factor is silly although Jedward are now out… I’ll miss them.

Just Gotta Get Right Out Of Here

I really need to get out more. In fact, so much so, that I’m going to the English Society Sci-Fi and Fantasy social. I’m not dressing up because that would be silly.

My parents are coming down to Aber this weekend. I was informed of this news at 11:30 yesterday morning, when I was still fast asleep and was woken by my phone ringing loudly and my mother cheerily telling me she was coming to see me. Of course, I’d love to see them but I didn’t appreciate being woken up for this.

I have been a student recently and eaten crap food. A takeaway of cheesy chips and a 12 inch pizza proved too much food for me and I have eaten enough calories for a week. I have no nice food left in the house but I’m not upset as I am getting overly fat again and this must be stopped immediately. I still have a healthy amount of orange squash, which is keeping me going though.

Today, in Creative Writing, we were told that eavesdropping on conversations can produce some really useful material for use in your work. In fact, creative writers are encouraged to sit in cafes and listen to people’s conversations. Apparently, it’s not stalking, it’s “research”. As an experienced stalker, I’m going to try this method out soon and am quite excited about doing so.

I’m hoping to see Dan between my birthday and Christmas, preferably the 23rd, as this will be our year anniversary (on and off admittedly but still a year). Yes, I know it’s gone incredibly fast. I feel married to him and have done for a while and it’s a really strange feeling! Certainly, recently, I’ve felt like I don’t want anyone else and that this is it now.

I would quite like to see This Is It but I don’t know if I’ll be able to, as Aber cinemas are crap.

You’re Already The Voice Inside My Head

Everyone is ill again. No exaggeration. I haven’t been out in a while. I could have gone out last night with the English society but forgot about it. I have a lot of reading to do anyway.

I kinda want to go home sometimes. I get moments when all I want to do is get on a train and go home. I miss everyone so much, it’s crazy. Even people I didn’t think I’d miss, people I didn’t even really know, I miss them. I miss my family. I miss my friends. I miss Dan. I miss the good times. I even miss Bullers.

I get my first assignment back on Friday and I don’t think I want it back. I wasn’t best pleased with it and I don’t think it was that good.

I have a friend. Well, I call him a friend. Chris. He’s the geekiest geek in the world. He likes this girl and he wants me to be with him, when he tries to chat her up tomorrow morning. I’m scared. Not only for him but scared I’m going to burst out laughing when he says something really stupid. I’m a good friend though, I know I am. That’s why I agreed to be there for him, when he’s not REALLY what I’d call a PROPER friend. I mean, he doesn’t even know about this blog, I can write what I want, it’s ok.

Oh and just on time! Blink’s I Miss You just came on iTunes…

I Would Really Like A Reading Week…

Wow what a fast week! I’m afraid to say that I got outrageously drunk on Wednesday night in the club Why Not in Aber. So drunk in fact that I lost Bex completely, an Irish guy was involved somehow, I know I was sick, I didn’t get in till about 4am, fell asleep in my clothes with the bedroom light on. I remember little about the night. I trust it was good though.

I found out yesterday morning that Bex had come home 3 hours before me. This means, I must have spent 3 hours in the toilet at Why Not being sick. It’s all very vague to me but I have vague outlines of memories from it.

I have a Creative Writing portfolio in for Monday. I’ve barely started it to be honest. I have to write two more poems (one has to be in iambic pentameter… won’t happen!), write a critical commentary about my own writing and do a bibliography of 5 books we feel could help us when writing our own work. I also have to read Titus Andronicus. This is something I’m really not looking forward to. I’ve heard it’s stupidly and unnecessarily violent. I also need to watch the film. I probably won’t do this.

I am also upset that I have no reading week this semester. I was under the impression we had one next week but a lecturer confirmed yesterday that we don’t have one until next semester. Mega sadface.

Halloween Weekend At Home

Oh wow, what a weekend it was! Seeing everyone I love in the same couple of days after 5 long weeks blew me away! My bedroom has had a makeover, with a new wardrobe and chest of drawers, which are all mirrored, so my room now looks huge. Sleeping in my own bed was the best thing ever!

Luke has been offered a modelling job with Diesel. Random, I know. Some girl he knows sent them a photo and they phoned and asked him down for a shoot! He’s never wanted to be a model, by the way. He’d hate all the make-up and being told what to wear. However, they pay great money and he’s considering it. Because he’s only 16, he needs parents’ permission but my parents appear to be fully behind it. He would hate it and I’m sure he won’t do it more than once.

Sophie’s Halloween party seemed to be fun for everyone apart from Sophie. Sadface. She was ill and her niece was trying to sleep upstairs, so her parents kept coming down and telling us all to be quiet and then they got angry that things were being broken or ruined. Thing is, for some reason they blamed everything on Sophie. I didn’t like the fact that she wasn’t having fun. I gave her as many hugs and kisses as I could throughout the night but she was still sad. She went to bed eventually, which was understandable, as all the people who no one knew were making too much noise, even though they knew Sophie would get in trouble for it.

Dan and his best friend Lewis were there. I loved seeing them as they made me laugh SO much! Was the first time I’d met Lewis and I really liked him, so that was cool. Dan seemed to like my friends too, so that was awesome!

Had my first roast dinner in 5 weeks yesterday! Oh my god, it was SO lovely!!!! My nan is the roast dinner queen and it tasted SO good. I guess I won’t get another until Christmas now though. Sadface.

I like the fact that I have another opportunity to do some more music journalism in the form of a Facebook message I got about an online magazine wanting journalists. If this is genuine, I’m incredibly excited!

After an amazing weekend, I’m back in Aber now. Gave my assignment in this morning and it’s all back to my routine here. I want to go back home. Badly.

Living For The Weekend

I cannot describe how excited I am about going home this weekend! It’s actually off the scale excitement!! I miss everyone SO much, its crazy and I just can’t wait to get all the hugs and for everything to be just how I know it and how I love it.

I had a nightmare of a Creative Writing seminar today. I didn’t want to read out my rubbish page of fiction about a creepy old house on a hill but I had to at the end because I was the only one in the group who hadn’t read it out yet. I hated it, to say the least but we’re not allowed to say that. It was terrible and it was even worse when everyone else pretty much agreed. It was silent when asked to give comments on it and then the comments which were said were just obviously looking for the few good bits and repeating them… Wow, how bad.

We have a new housemate. She’s called Sandra and she’s from Latvia but I’ve already had more conversation with her than I had with Dominike in 3 weeks, so it’s looking good so far!

I’ve just had an e-mail about the blogging space on the uni website and it sounds like they’ve got it together now. FINALLY! I’ve had the laptop they gave me for almost a month now and I haven’t had any contact from them since then. Was beginning to think they’d given up but it doesn’t appear they have, which is AWESOME!

I have a Coleridge assignment due in for next Monday, which I really should start soon, as I won’t have this weekend to do it. It’s not very long, only 3 pages and apparently it doesn’t count for very much but I’d still like to do it well.

Me and Dan are doing better and he’s coming with two of his friends (and a car!) to the Halloween party this weekend. SO excited!

I love you and miss you all very much indeed but Alex will be back in Bromley soon. I promise!

In Two Minds

So Aber uni is going pretty well for me. I like everyone and they seem to genuinely like me. I like my two days off in the middle of the week too, they’re so relaxing and my timetable is awesome compared to some people’s.

I miss people though. I can’t wait for Halloween weekend at Sophie’s. I might not want to go back! I’m just sad it can’t be a longer stay but at least I’ll get to see my favourite people.

Me and Dan are going through the worst bad patch we’ve ever been through. It’s killing me to be honest. It was my fault of course, because he’d never do anything to hurt me. It involved another guy who was nasty to him with regard to my promiscuity and tartiness, basically. I hate myself for it because I do love him and I care about him more than anything.

I have a Creative Writing assignment that I’m unclear of what it’s actually about. It’s “write a piece of fiction foregrounding one or more of the following: description, dialogue, character or voice” but it’s not allowed to be just a page of description of something or a page of dialogue. So surely, you have to use more than one of them? I think it’s an opening of a novel or something but I’m not sure. I guess I should ask someone on my course or a tutor or something. I’m confused, it’s all very ambiguous.

I went to this Carnage event last night, which was basically a pub crawl around Aber. I was with Bex and her friends from school and the people in their flat. Hayley and Leanne hadn’t bought the t-shirts we needed to be able to go, so it was just me and Bex from our house. I met more new people and they were all lovely, with an exception of a serious attention seeker but I hate bitching online. It always gets back to the wrong person and becomes a huge drama. Alex hates drama. Fact.

Dominike Has Left The Building

The past few days have been somewhat relaxing. My train tickets to go home arrived, which made me more excited about the whole idea of seeing everyone again. Really can’t wait now.

Had my first Creative Writing workshop on Monday, which was scary, although I didn’t get to read my short story of the dog, as there wasn’t time and I didn’t want to be one of the first. The pieces which were read out, however, were SO good I felt intimidated a bit. Lauren, the girl I’ve recently got quite friendly with was sitting next to me and she said mine was good. I didn’t believe her!

Almost finished one of my course books. The Bloody Chamber by Angela Carter, which is a collection of short stories showing a darker side of fairytales. It’s not the most riveting thing I’ve ever read. In fact, it’s odd but I should really take a bit of an interest in it, if I’m doing a module on it. It talks about werewolves and vampires. The vampire in the story I’ve just finished reading The Lady Of The House Of Love is meant to be Count Dracula’s daughter, who feeds off men who she lures to her castle by offering them dinner and bed for the night. It’s all very odd and silly and it ends with her being dead because she falls in love with one particular man, who she lures there and finds she can’t eat him. That’s pretty much it, to be honest. Great.

It would appear that Dominike (as I’ve since learnt how to spell her name), our Polish housemate has moved out. She is now an ex-housemate. We didn’t receive a goodbye from her though. We just noticed a man carrying her things down the stairs in boxes and put them in the back of a taxi outside. Her room is now empty but all her kitchen things and her food are still in the kitchen. We saw her in the club Pier Pressure, where we were last night (which was really good actually) but she didn’t see us and we didn’t want to disturb her clearly good night with a cute boy who had war paint on his face.

So this probably means, we will find ourselves with a new housemate in due course. When this will be, who they will be still remain a mystery. We are hoping for someone we can talk to this time. Someone who will go out with us and share our fun.

£63 Short

Lectures have started now. The first few were TERRIBLY boring but today’s were considerably more interesting, thank god.

I had a phone call from Sophie on Tuesday, after I’d got a LOVELY letter from her, which made me cry because I miss her. It made me SO happy to hear her voice, although I now miss her EVER so much more! Copper spoke to me too and now I’m SO excited about going home for her Halloween party. I booked the train tickets today, which came to a total of £63 (!!!) for an off-peak ticket, which is what I need, as I’m staying there for the weekend. I was incredibly upset about this expenditure but I didn’t have a choice, it seemed. Sadface.

As a result, I can no longer go out on lovely clothes shopping trips, which I’m VERY sad about. However, I do need to find something to wear to the Halloween party. Hopefully Dan can come. I miss him LOADS too.

I’ve had a Creative Writing assignment to do with memories. The girl next to me in the introductory lecture to the course wrote a memory about receiving a puppy one Christmas. Oddly enough, I wrote about getting Felix. I’ve decided to write this girl’s memory of getting the dog from the dog’s point of view, which I’ve done before in the OU course I did on writing fiction. I’m quite proud of it at the moment, although it is a bit long and needs to be cut down.

I’ve decided I need a job. It certainly would help a lot financially and it would be something to do with all this seemingly free time I have.

Everyone is still being nice at the moment. Maybe they genuinely are nice people and I just got lucky with who my housemates are. Hopefully we’ll still like each other next year, so we can maybe think about getting a house together then. However, they’re nothing like my real friends who I LOVE silly amounts!

Blonde Home Alone

So Aber freshers life is going GREAT! I have my new laptop now, which is just so much better than my old one, it’s insane. I met my team mates who I’ll be blogging with, two guys. We had a discussion about how the blogs would be written and we showed them our blogs that we’ve been doing every day. They said they were awesome which raised the confidence, of course.

Bex managed to slice her thumb with a carving knife while the rest of us were in Morrisons. We left her at home because she’d been ill for a few days but we came back to find an unbaked potato, a huge knife and a first aid kit strewn across the worktop in the kitchen. We assumed she’d just come down to get some paracetamol, until she came through the door a while later with her thumb bandaged up, saying she’d been in A&E for two hours! We didn’t leave her alone for very long! Apparently she’d phoned Nick, who lives at Number 28 (we live at number 134) and he’d come over and taken her to hospital.

Sorted out my timetable now. I only have 8 hours of lectures and seminars combined, so lots of free time with Tuesdays and Wednesdays off. Quite happy about that.

Although everyone is nice, David (who is also here) upset me majorly yesterday by giving me lots of undeserved abuse and said hurtful things. It then caused an argument between me and Dan, as he got upset when he heard I’d spoken to David. It all got very sad and tearful and nasty. Not good at all, when you’re so far away from everything.

I want to go home. I think it is right for me to be here but I miss everything LOADS. Soon people, very soon.